Letters to Myself....The Sad Feeling

I started off writing this poem about someone,
But then I lost myself on line one,

So I lay on my back,
Staring at the stars,
And it was like staring at something that twinkles from afar,
But when near...fades...dwindles,

It was like staring at something that,
Could have been,
Should have been
But wouldn't be... will never be,

So I lay on my back,
When I should be prostrate on your heart,
Feeling its beat inches away like it was mine,
Feeling that heat of undying love,

However, it is fine,
Because maybe that feeling,
Of every beat speaking,
Of something,

Something so deep,
So steep,
One cannot overclimb, overcome,
Or claim over time,

Was too much a painful flame,
I would not be able to understand,
Appreciate or love in its time, or..
Over time,

And I am so sad...so sad,
So mad...so mad....so sad,

I started off writing this poem about someone,
But instead I lay on my back,
Staring at the stars,
That could have been,
Should have been,
But...I am so sad.

Kavosa Assava