Friday, 3 May 2013


"In the past I had chastised my spirit. Now it is in a worn and torn form like it got hit by the bomb called life and it is clear that this weapon is nuclear and when I peer into my future like a naive deer crossing the road, not expecting to be steered off life's course by an unconscious human behind the steer who happens to be in too much of a rush to peer into the oncoming traffic, cross cutting traffic such as the deer; I realize that I know nothing."

     I believe I spend too much time thinking about my future. Many of us do really. I do it because I would like to think there is a better life ahead of me. One filled with joy and abundant luxuries. The number of times I have dreamed of what my house will look like! Picket fence outlining a yard covered by the greenest grass this side of the Indian ocean. Two or three white dogs, I don't care what breed. I just want them to be so white when you look at them, you feel like taking a shower. A tall dark and handsome man mowing the lawn. That's my husband. He used to be a rugby player before starting his own company. What kind of business is he running? I don't know but he is RICH! Legal money of course and I get to buy all the shoes his fortune can afford. I could just die:):):) He works so hard and he is so prrrreeeeeeettttty....sigh. My kids will have amazing hair and all the neighbors kids will want to play with them because they are so preettttty.

     Enough of the rambling. I know women like to pretend they are down to earth and wouldn't mind a struggling man and average looking kids you know. As long as you're happy and love each other blahblahblah..... Which is true, we shall all have to settle because unfortunately your life has already been planned and the dreams you want to come true are probably not what you need and will remain just that, dreams! This however, does not mean it's time to become a cynic because life sucks and my husband is broke. Look at him....'even his breathing pisses me off..mmh!'

     That is how most of us become. Because we have created such high expectations for our lives, we get lost in the awesomeness of it all and forget that the determining factors of what your life will be like is based on what you do in the present to actualize that future. We get sucked into this lifestyle of, 'there are no good men,' because 'good' in this instance means he can afford to take me to dinner every other day and still pay the bills. Men do it as well...talking about how it is so hard to find a good woman nowadays. They are just gold diggers, want to use you and they can't even cook!

     To be honest, I get confused with the gold digger argument. Most men my age still depend on their parents so I do not think you are anywhere near the "gold diggers'" radar. She is out there confusing some unsuspecting thirty-something year old man with his own house and car. However, if your parents are gracious with their fortune, you should bear in mind that women will look at you differently. A humble life is much more fulfilling I can assure you and if you have to tone down on how accessible things are for you, do it.

Proverbs 14: 20 'No one likes the poor, not even their neighbours, but the rich have many friends.'

To identify who are your real friends, do normal things like jav once in a while, don't pay the full bill,give to charity or even try save that money. How is this safe guarding your future? It helps you avoid disappointment that can affect your future relationships.  Without you even knowing it, you will begin distrusting everyone.

We are human and sooner or later we get tired of being taken advantage of. We develop insecurities in our friendships. I know guys don't like the word 'insecure' but truth be told, all of us are insecure about many things. These insecurities can lead to making emotional decisions which at times become counterproductive. For instance dropping current friends and moving from one clique to another trying to figure out who you are likely to identify with better, which group of people are likely to be honest with you and not try reap what they can sow, so to speak, from the friendship. 

This goes back to what I was talking about, the future. Who you are now has a direct link to what you will be like. Make sure the decisions you make today do not come and haunt you in the future. We need to be careful we are not piling up rubble of unwanted consequences which will soon come tumbling down on us and we'll be looking for those 'fake' friends to come to our rescue and they'll be gone.


Society has become shallow and materialistic. Men only want riches because women only want men with riches or so it appears.We pick our close friends based on how they were brought up and how much money they have, forgetting that friendships should be based on love. We think if we hang out with people who talk about how much wealth they will have in the years to come, somehow that wealth will multiply itself into our bank accounts and magic we will all live the same lifestyle, date the same people and have all the things money can buy.

Just to clarify, God already has a plan for you. It's only a matter of time you sat and you heard it. If you think you can fight hard enough to avoid doing His will because it does not fit into what you consider your lifestyle, be sure. He has never and is not about to lose a fight. He won already and if you want to win as well, seek to fulfil His will. 

I may never marry that hot man nor afford to buy shampoo for three white dogs because it isn't in God's plan. My husband might be a struggler....sufferer with an arra-erro accent and not a very small forehead. Combine his forehead and mine, you get a kavosalet who might have problems making friends in school because the world is mean and people with giant foreheads are not easily accepted.

So we all need to stop fantasizing about the future and start praying that God guides us each day to work hard in whatever we are doing at this moment. Have a plan, for sure but don't let this plan take over your life that you forget to enjoy the present. He tells us not to worry but to put all our wishes before Him through prayer and whatever we ask for, we shall receive. I know you're thinking, 'But now if I want to be Rich?!' It is as confusing to me as it is to you and I am not going to attempt to understand what God meant.

 However, this is what I think. All these earthly possession we seek, be it power, wealth, human affection, they are all for the sake of being happy. Everyone wants to be happy. It is the one thing we all have in common and you know what's even better than happiness? Joy. Do you know who gives you joy? Read Galatians 5:22. 

Kavosa Assava

1 comment:

  1. Ah! What a beautifully written article. I began at the top and couldn't stop reading! Well written,message very well executed! Great one here Kavossa!